Return of the Body Snatchers?

It has been a while since applications for the prerogative writ of habeas corpus (literally meaning ‘produce the body’) have been seen in our courts, which may explain why few lawyers were seen amongst the audience at the recent Stage Club production of ‘Habeas Corpus’. The audience were treated to a farcical witty romp peppered with typical British dry wit, but there was nary a body, dead or alive produced.

Pinning the Blame

Remembrance Day poppy sellers in the UK are being told to ask customers whether they want a pin with their poppy — in order to avoid being sued. The Royal British Legion has advised its poppy sellers not to hand out the pins needed for people to attach their poppies to their clothes.

Instead they must ask buyers if they want one, in a bid to stop people claiming for compensation if they accidentally injure themselves. This step has been taken due to the growing compensation culture which is causing people to increasingly take legal action for injury to themselves.

Has anyone thought of sticking to stickers?

Signs of the Times

Spotted in a toilet of a London (UK) office:
Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

In a laundromat:
Automatic washing machines: Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.

In an office:
Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.

In an office pantry:
After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.

Sign at a conference:
For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is a day care centre on the first floor.

On a repair shop door:
We can repair anything (Please knock hard on the door — the bell doesn’t work).

Poet Lawyereate

Long before there were multi-disciplinary practices, there were already lawyer-writers, lawyer-actors and even lawyer-bakers. Lawyer-footballer he may not be, but Jason Butwick of a UK City firm good-naturedly put pen to paper after his firm was defeated 14 to one in football by Allen & Overy:

Wasn’t much
Just a decent touch
From one yard out
A geriatric gout-ridden
Woman
With no feet
Could have ruined our opponent’s clean sheet
As well as me
But
In the silent second
That the ball
Bulged
The empty net
Time took time
To let me reflect
Upon the set faces
Of my team.
The team from Enders Pond
Together.
In unison.
And quite uncommon bond
An oiled machine.
A Superteam.
Impregnable.
Invincible.
Doing what had to be done.
And losing, all the same, by 14 goals to one.