Work to Live or Live to Work
 

Many lawyers ask me how I juggle my ever-growing list of pursuits. My interest and belief in the value of these activities are my motivation. At the outset of my career, I made the decision that the purpose of my life is making our society a better place to live in. It is a painstaking and conscious effort to carry out my commitments daily. I do not feel that I manage well.

Lately, the concept of work-life balance has received a lot of attention. The Work-Life Unit of the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports is responsible for promoting work-life harmony and helping to create family-friendly offices in Singapore.

Thanks to modern technology, work has permeated all aspects of our lives. Working long hours and working over weekends have become fashionable. The Internet and mobile phones have introduced the concept of a ‘working vacation’. I am still wondering what motivates law firm partners to spend long hours at work. Maybe they can make loads of money by sharing their secret wisdom? Can money, expensive acquisitions, fine restaurants and expensive holidays make up for lost youth, time, leisure, family, marriage and children?

The Americans have got one thing right – the importance of family and personal life. Have we?

I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practice resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, to reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience and to be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion. Henry David Thoreau

‘The current trend of life in Singapore will 
continue until we stop worshipping materialism,’ says 31-year-old Justin Lee who subscribes to Thoreau’s philosophy. During his legal education, Justin decided not to practise law so as to achieve inner peace within himself.

Justin spends part of his working hours with Colin Ng & Partners. He manages their special projects focusing on information technology and office administration. He also provides legal support to lawyers to ease their heavy workload and during trials. ‘I enjoyed the study of law for its intellectual challenge. I enjoy litigation, which is much better than any chess game.’ However, he feels that the man-made legal system is flawed and the practice of law is mercenary. ‘Being paid mouthpieces of our clients, we often have to compromise values such as truth and personal ethics to represent the client’s interests. Is justice really done?’ he asked me one Friday night.

Unassuming but never hesitant to express his views, Justin is referred to as ‘the man of leisure’ by his contemporaries. He works part-time and spends the rest of his time fishing, playing with his three dogs and cat. ‘Fishing is a metaphor for life. We are always trying to catch something,’ this self-confessed ‘simple fisherman’ said.

Like Socrates, he believes that the life unexamined is not worth living. Justin should not be dismissed as idealistic. As each moment of life will never ever come back again, he takes life seriously. Lifestyle should dictate a person’s career and not vice versa. Balance in life, for Justin, is obtained by balancing quality of life against standard of living. He elaborates that a person enjoys quality of life when he finds self-fulfillment through work and play.

A man of diverse interests, Justin works half the number of hours of his peers and is contented. He is happy and plans his future in blocks of 20 years. He hopes to study medicine as he feels that doctors have an important role to play in life.

Thio Ying Ying with her husband and their impressive brood

Family First
 

Another lawyer who enjoys litigation very much is Thio Ying Ying, head of Kelvin Chia Partnership’s Litigation Department. ‘Let me show you a photograph of my children,’ she says at the beginning of our interview in her office in Suntec City Tower Four, which boasts a panoramic view. In the photograph, I see Ying Ying with her six children ranging from seven to 17 years of age.

She manages a team of five junior partners and six associates in the office. Referring to law as her ‘beloved profession’, she says that she loves her work too much. ‘Litigation is a good way to start a legal career. 
It offers a good base to build up on other areas of law,’ she explains. In litigation practice, she enjoys many challenges. The wins and losses have also helped her to grow and mature as a person. ‘There are two ways of practising litigation. You can put in your very best or you can just go through the motions of the litigation process. The former would be a painful experience especially when you lose and yet, there is always something to be learnt and someone whose life you have touched.’

She met her spouse, Bernard, in pre-university when they were both 17 years old. They married nine years later after he graduated as a doctor. They had all of their children in the first 12 years of their marriage. ‘Let me tell you that life is not a bed of roses. It was really difficult especially when the children were young. Although I was fortunate to have the support of my parents, my parents-in-law and two maids to take care of my children all under one roof, it was and remains difficult to balance a hectic litigation practice and a family,’ she says earnestly.

Her husband has always been a pillar of support in her career. He maintained a less hectic medical practice for most of their marriage so that he could spend more time at home with the children.

Although the balance between work and life is often a tussle, Ying Ying would not trade her family and children for anything else. She preaches what she practises. She and her husband are National Co-ordinators of Choice, Singapore, a family life programme run by the Catholic Church. They speak to varsity students and young adults about relationships, marriage and having children. ‘We try to spread the Good News of marriage and help young people believe in building family relationships despite the dismal state of family life. We also encourage them to practise chastity as young adults and to focus on the importance of building relationships that are based on good communication, fidelity and forgiveness.’

Ying Ying took pains to explain to me the joys and importance of having children when I expressed disinterest in having children. I do not want to be burdened by parenting demands. ‘Children help us to live and they help to make us better people. Our six children have been the greatest and most meaningful undertaking in our lives. It is a happy marriage that helps children to grow and be nurtured; so Bernard and I treasure and continuously build our relationship.’

On the subject of educating children, Ying Ying is different from most Singaporean parents. 
She does not feel stressed when her children do not ace their classes. Important lessons in human relationships and values such as forgiveness and less emphasis on material gains are taught to her children. ‘The more emphasis parents place on material aspects, the less their children will feel worthy as individuals,’ she shares.

The work front plays a pivotal role in carving out a balance in our lives. Being an equity partner dictates that she is expected to provide a high quality of service to her clients and match the different strengths of her associates to the different tasks to fulfill this objective. ‘It is no longer sufficient to pay associates good salaries only. We need to help them maintain a manageable lifestyle.’

She does not believe that long working hours should be regarded as a law firm’s culture. ‘We work late when there is a real need and not for the sake of working late.’

Make the Right Choice
 

When I last spoke to Sheena Jacob on the telephone in January 2001, she was telecommuting to spend more time with her young children. When I met her last month, she told me that she was now only telecommuting on Tuesday afternoons, when her children, now 10 and seven, are at home. This petite and soft-spoken woman now heads the Intellectual Property Department in Alban Tay Mahtani & 
De Silva.

Sheena echoes Ying Ying’s views that it is possible to provide dedicated and quality legal services whilst maintaining a positive lifestyle. Having worked in the same law firm throughout her legal career, she said that the support of her superiors were instrumental in helping her to balance the demands of home with work.

‘It is important for law firms to have sound family life practices. I am not suggesting for a moment that work performance and the delivery of quality service to clients should be made secondary. We need to motivate our young lawyers with more than money. Find out what each associate needs. If he gets his work done, does it matter when, where and how he performs his task?’ Alban Tay Mahtani was the first law firm to win the Family Life Award.

‘Look at the Singapore education system and lifestyle. We have not achieved work-life balance.’ Sheena adds that Singaporeans tend to look to the government to promulgate such a lifestyle. She herself places the onus of finding the balance in life on the individual. ‘Choose what you want and stick by it.’ According to her, lawyers who work long hours do not necessarily produce better quality work compared to one who works shorter hours. Lawyers blame their clients for their own unhealthy working hours. ‘This is not always true. Clients do understand if you explain to them your work style and give them what they need.’

During the other weekdays, Sheena leaves for home at about 6.30pm. She does her work at night while the children are doing their homework. Balancing work and life is for everyone, not only the married lawyers. ‘There is nothing wrong with taking a break from practice to rest, recharge or learn a new skill.’

A Lawyer’s Guide to Work-Life Balance

An Australian lawyer once said that he wants to be a human being who practises law, not a lawyer who practises to be a human being. Isn’t this what all of us want?

Lawyers say that they have no choice but to spend long hours at work and as a result have no time for a life. Do we have a right of choice? It depends on you.

Is work-life balance possible? Yes, if you truly want it.

Here’s my work-life balance test:
 

1   Do you work more than ten hours every day?

2   Do you work during your lunch hour?

3   Do you work on Saturdays or Sundays or both?

4   Do you work during your vacation?

5   Do you check your e-mails during your vacation?

6   Does your office call you on your mobile more than once every day of your vacation?

7   Do you dream about your work in your sleep?

8   Do you worry about your work while you are at home?

If you answer ‘yes’ to any of the questions, you do not have a work-life balance. If you think that it is wrong to say ‘no’ to any of the questions, your work is your life. If you think it is wrong to say ‘yes’ to any of the questions, ask yourself the following:

1   Am I happy with my current life? 
 

‘Peace with your innerself is important. Do not despise what you have in your hand for what you desire in your heart,’ Justin advises.

2   Am I happy with my job? 
 

If your answer is ‘no’, then what do you want from your life? ‘One way to find out is to know what you do not want to do,’ suggests Justin.

3   How important is my law practice in my life?

4   Is money the end-all to me?

5   How do I create a balance in 
my life?

According to Justin, work-life balance methods have to be customised to suit each individual’s needs. My personality dictates that I intersperse my life with various work styles. Some common methods are: 

1   Flexi work or part-time work – working a certain number of hours per week or working on certain days of the week.

Justin, however, shares that it is not possible to stick to this system religiously. ‘You may have to return to the office on your off days or work beyond your working hours on certain occasions. Both you and your employers have to adopt a give-and-take approach.’

2   Telecommute – working from home or elsewhere.

I telecommute sometimes. Create a conducive work area at home. Invest in hardware such as laptops, broadband system, separate telephone lines, printers and fax machines. Plan the work that you wish to accomplish in order to telecommute effectively. The advantages are flexibility to engage in other pursuits at home or elsewhere. For me, this work system helps me to spend time with my mother who does not live with me.

3   Dividing working hours between office and home.

‘Fix a time when you want to leave your office and stick to it,’ suggests Justin. This will help to achieve the work goals for the day and have a balanced life.

I leave the office at 6.00pm when I do not have meetings in the evenings. I return home to cook and have dinner with my wife who works fixed hours. While she attends to other household chores, I return to my work. Working at home allows me to spend time with my wife and at the same time, it is relaxing and less distracting. Sometimes, I do my work in the neighbourhood cafes. The change of environment is refreshing and inviting to work in. 

4   Speak to your supervising partners to work out a suitable work-life balance for yourself and your employers.

The management of law firms needs to understand the psyche of the modern day lawyer. Lawyers’ intangible needs must also be understood, such as happiness, satisfaction in their work and time to engage in other pursuits. If employers meet their employees’ requests, they may reap many advantages – the attrition rate may improve and annual medical leave can be substantially reduced. Commitment and staff loyalty are boosted. The legal profession may not lose as many of its lawyers. 

Both Ying Ying and Sheena encourage their associates to speak to them about their needs. Both then work out a suitable working arrangement with them.

Often, lawyers have many self-limitations that prevent them from enjoying balanced lives. Sheena urges her associates to ‘dare to dream and enjoy the journey ahead’.

The Facts and Myths of Work-Life Balance
 

‘There is no such thing as a perfect work-life balance,’ declares Ying Ying. She adds that it is a daily challenge. ‘Accept that you enjoy a better balance on some days than others. Sometimes, you just have to spend more time at the office to meet deadlines, complete urgent work or prepare for a trial.’

Promotions and pay rises are slower. This can be a fact or a myth, depending on the employer’s perception and the value he places on his employee. According to Justin, a worker is worth his wages. The employee has to make some difficult choices based on his priorities.    

Trying to create a work-life balance must bring its own innate satisfaction. Your family and loved ones are not going to express gratitude for your making changes to your lifestyle. In fact, they become more demanding, says Sheena of her children.

You do not necessarily work lesser hours. Sometimes, you may work the same number of hours as your counterparts or even more hours. However, you enjoy the opportunity to stagger your working hours. In addition, personal skills such as honesty, discipline, prioritisation and good work management skills are crucial to making it all work out.

Rajan Chettiar

Rajan Chettiar & Co

E-mail: rajan@rajanchettiar.com